Tired

Tired & Exhausted..

It summarises everything. Thank you.

Not That Simple After All....

http://www.paulsadowski.com/Numbers.asp

What Your Name Means

You entered: Nor Aisha

There are 8 letters in your name.Those 8 letters total to 40There are 4 vowels and 4 consonants in your name.

Your number is: 4

The characteristics of #4 are: A foundation, order, service, struggle against limits, steady growth.

The expression or destiny for #4:Order, service, and management are the cornerstones of the number 4 Expression. Your destiny is to express wonderful organization skills with your ever practical, down-to-earth approach. You are the kind of person who is always willing to work those long, hard hours to push a project through to completion. A patience with detail allows you to become expert in fields such as building, engineering, and all forms of craftsmanship. Your abilities to write and teach may lean toward the more technical and detailed.

In the arts, music will likely be your choice. Artistic talents may also appear in such fields as horiculture and floral arrangement, as well. Many skilled physicians and especially surgeons have the 4 Expression.

The positive attitudes of the 4 Expression yield responsibility; you are one who no doubt, fulfills obligations, and is highly systematic and orderly. You are serious and sincere, honest and faithful. It is your role to help and you are required to do a good job at everything you undertake.


If there is too much 4 energies present in your makeup, you may express some of the negative attitudes of the number 4. The obligations that you face may tend to create frustration and feelings of limitation or restriction. You may sometimes find yourself nursing negative attitudes in this regard and these can keep you in a rather low mood. Avoid becoming too rigid, stubborn, dogmatic, and fixed in your opinions. You may have a tendency to develop and hold very strong likes and dislikes, and some of these may border on the classification of prejudice.

The negative side of 4 often produces dominant and bossy individuals who use disciplinarian to an excess. These tendencies must be avoided. Finally, like nearly all with 4 Expression, you must keep your eye on the big picture and not get overly wrapped up in detail and routine.


Your Soul Urge number is: 8

A Soul Urge number of 8 means: With an 8 soul urge, you have a natural flair for big business and the challenges imposed by the commercial world. Power, status and success are very important to you. You have strong urges to supervise, organize and lead. Material desires are also very pronounced. You have good executive abilities, and with these, confidence, energy and ambition.

Your mind is analytical and judgment sound; you're a good judge of material values and also human character. Self-controlled, you rarely let emotions cloud judgment. You are somewhat of an organizer at heart, and you like to keep those beneath you organized and on a proper track. This is a personality that wants to lead, not follow. You want to be known for your planning ability and solid judgment.

The negative aspects of the 8 soul urge are the often dominating and exacting attitude. You may have a tendency to be very rigid, sometimes stubborn.

Your Inner Dream number is: 5

An Inner Dream number of 5 means: You dream of being totally free and unrestrained by responsibility. You see yourself conversing and mingling with the natives in many nations, living for adventure and life experiences. You imagine what you might accomplished.

Its juz A Game..

It says....

“Allow yourself a winter season for introspection, personal evaluation, contemplation and transformation. Then get back in the game."

She said....

"Whassup? i know we haven't spoken for a while I was thinking bout you and it kinda made me smile So many things to say and I'll put them in a letter
Thought it might be easier, the words might come out better
How's your mother? How's your little nephew? Does he still look just like you?
So many things I wanna know the answers to

Wish i could press rewind and rewrite every line to the story of me and you


Don't you know I've tried, I've tried to get you off my mind but it don't get no better as each day go by and I'm lost and confuse I've got nothing to lose hope to hear from you soon... P.S I'm still not over you

Excuse me, I really didn't mean to ramble on there's a lot of feelings that remains since you've been gone I guess you thought that I would've it all behind me but it seems there's always something right there to remind me like a silly joke or something on the TV, boy it ain't easy when I hear our song I get that same old feeling

wish I could press rewind, turn back the hands of time and I shouldn't be telling you

Don't you know I've tried, I've tried to get you off my mind but it don't get no better as each day go by and I'm lost and confuse I've got nothing to lose hope to hear from you soon... P.S I'm still not over you (you, still not over you)

Did you know I've kept all of your pictures
Don't have the strength to part with them yet Oooh nooo.. tried to erase The way your kisses taste But some things a girl can never forget

Don't you know I've tried, I've tried to get you off my mind but it don't get no better as each day go by and I'm lost and confuse I've got nothing to lose hope to hear from you soon...

P.S I'm still not over you Still not over you, see I've tried to forget you

Don't you know I've tried, I've tried to get you off my mind but it don't get no better as each day go by and I'm lost and confuse

I've got nothing to lose hope to hear from you soon...

P.S I'm still not over you ...."


He said.." let it go..."

I'm back..

Alright..i have no idea where would I start.. but I thought I might as well give it a shot..

Ok.. it been quite a while since I've been trying to heal the wounded soul..haha… ok.. it’s a mid-life crisis (as sarcastically described by my dearie kuzzin).. honestly, I just wonder how do they deal with it? Let's take the case of my beloved, loud, extremely indecipherable… totally out-of-this-world à 'Piza'..

At one time, she was torn apart between two totally wacko blokes..then fell into the phase of ' oh..we're just best friends now' (whatever.. talk-to-my-hand).. to the phase of 'he got someone!!! Waaaaaaaaaahhhh' to the phase of 'I've met two new guys..' and it all happen in less than a month. (Its an achievement saying that in one single breath)

It was just like having a bad patch and covering it up with some damn bloody good stitch..and there u go.. Viola!! Al-Presto… "And they lived happily ever after.." Though she didn’t get married yet… I bet she will if she isn't college right now…heh..

Things haven't been going quite right for me.. on the inside.. it was like tumultuous ride .. been bottling things up too much..to the point they got onto my sleep.. so as you can sense by now.. its wrecking me up.. . Well..it even got me on the outside.. physically.. - been putting on a few kilos…I'm having a war with my zits..and trust me they look like mini volcanoes at the verge of erupting (though not ready to burst as yet..) my hair's getting in a mess (but at least I got the itchy scalp problem under control- Thanx to Regane hair products - affordable & works wonders!!)

I know I'm vain..but unfortunately beauty comes with a price .. It needs tender loving care ..pruning.. cleaning..toning.. clearing 'potholes'... (I'm so gona squeeze that pimple out.. la lala… lala… )

Despite the emotional roller-coaster ride, strangely… I felt like 'home' or you would call 'getting back your old-self'. .. It’s a feeling where you're back to who you really are.. reading novels back in my room under my duvet, chocolates & your bottle of Evian by your side.. chatting online with god-knows-who (I found this 'TalkCity' chatroom ..well, I've forgotten how fun it was especially after that sticky-internet incident.).. hanging out at home doing practically nothing (except getting my work done - which reminds me that I've yet to complete my set of 'Proteins' lecture slides & notes) and yeah.. back to writing.. creative juices are on the flow.. and yes.. I feel like going shopping.. can't wait for Thursday to come (its gona be a gurls'- day- out' and yes..I'm looking forward to catch my heart throb - SRK's new movie).

Well.. been at home for too long.. more than 48 hours really.. I knew I need the fresh air.. and the vitamin D.. (well. No worries.. I'm heading to the reservoir tomorrow morning for a brisk walking session with my dear pal.. who's kind enough to entertain my nonsense.. ) Honestly, no one in the west would want to travel that far for some brisk walking exercise, surrounded by monkeys making-out or monkey families hanging out together or having to see giant monitor lizard sun- tanning in the open.. but hey.. living in a concrete jungle.. having to be in a real untouched natural landscapes - trust me, the serenity will just sweeps you off your feet.. J Plus… the morning breakfast at the nearby hawker centre will make you return for more…. Hahah.. so much for trying to lose off the extra kilos..

Since it is a 1 week school term holiday… and I deserve a good break.. I've decided not to go to school or to have any extra lessons for my dear kids at school… but they better complete the holiday assignments by the time school term starts.. hehe..
Hmmm… I would be seen as a complete slacker (caught not doing any work.. who says I'm not??!!!) So, I've decided to join my kids in the crystal making session this coming Wednesday.

Did I tell you that we're taking part in a competition? It's like a fantasy come true…(ok, I'm nuts..but come on.. I'm a science teacher.. what do you expect?? Paris Hilton??)

I remember having to walk along the office alley at the NUS Chemistry Department, where they had all the crystals displayed. I've always been intrigued by how they were made…the colours, the shine, the size, the precision, my goodness… despite the fact one is not able to show it off on a necklace or a ring or your dangling ear-rings.. but trust me.. these wonderful crystals got me dazzled… I've always wanted to know how do they make all these crystals… Well… now, I can answer every single question that I used to ask myself… from the 'making of a saturated solution, getting the seed crystals.. the tying .. growing it'..phewww....

Trust me it isn't as simple as it looks… we even broke a 1 litre glass beaker along the process of getting and making the correct crystal.. and did anyone tell you that crystal making is damn expensive? A bottle of 1 kg of chrome alum cost around 300 bucks (or even more.. and this is one of the lowest grade quality in the market..)!!! And mind you…we used more than 5 kg this time… heh.. Well…though we may not win at the end of it.. but what the heck.. we had fun.. didn't we guys?

So much about crystals.. I even got back into the mood of joining our family gatherings… Upon my request…my dearest aunt had organised a family gathering last Saturday - cum- a mini birthday party for my little cousin.

Menu-of-the-day à Seoul garden.

Yeah… you heard me right… so we had a spread of fresh seafood on the 3 metres long table… and your hot plate.. and yes.. we even had sushi's ..homemade sushi.. my mum even tried her hands at making it.. trust me.. it looks like your typical chinese popiah..

It was great having everyone around.. and only then I realised how much my cousins have grown up.. nana was looking more and more stunning.. mira had definitely grown into this young funky easy going gal.. my little obnoxious youngest cousin started to grow her hair long.. but as cheeky as ever.. (I guess certain things don't change ..) and the rest are just growing up to be pretty and handsome.. heh.. well, it makes feel old to be among them... what the heck.. age are just numbers..

The family gathering wouldn’t be complete if there weren't any games or 'mini fireworks' session. But, the mini fireworks session didn't quite work well.., as the newly employed domestic helper had placed the 'fireworks sticks' in the refrigerator.. thinking that they were chocolate sticks.. hmm.. I just wonder if the chocolates sold in her country were as long as those… heh.. (Come to think of it..Pocky chocolates sticks do look like it…hehe..) So the fireworks display turned into a mass burning session… it got so dangerous that only my uncle was the one handling it..

Well...so much for that… we even got into the routine of watching great Thailand horror movies.. There's just something about these Thai horror movies... they are the best in the world.. the plot, the acting.. the whole sequence of it.. its not like your peek-a-boo..or sadako coming out of the well.. it was a 'meaningful' and not sense-less ghost movie.. and it’s the best form of family - entertainment.. (even though you end up screaming at the top of your lungs.. its fun when everyone is doing it also..hehe.. or comforting your little cousin that its only a movie.. and not for real ghost..) Ohh..how much I love my family.. :-)

Movin on.. Bring it On Life!!!

"Overwhelmed" - its the only apt term that I could use to describe the situation that I am in rite now.. its all moving so fast and procrastination would just drown you further (yeah..deep down..)
Assessing written reports, common tests, admin work, the nitty gritty things that builds up overtime .. and yes.. more to come definitely...

Having to practice 'Self motivation & Self discipline' is undeniably harder than it appears on the surface.. (let's include self-entertaining to keep my mind sane too..) Its frustrating when the time just dissolves away so rapidly that you can barely feel it.. Its really ironic having Me (!!!) to preach about time management to the kiddos' when in actual fact, I am the one who needs it badly..

Despite this, i would have to admit that the past two months have been a blast...

- Accomplishing the 10 km Big Walk

- Making it to the summit of Low's Peak (Mount Kinabalu, Sabah).. yeah.. pain in the knees hurt like mad.. and yah.. the 1st experience of walking like old grannies with walking stick.. but it was a golden opportunity of building up strength, perseverance and resilience.. [Dear Allah... all i wanted was to reach the summit and down back to the foot of mountain safe, sound..and still intact in one piece.. :-) Unfortunately, i forget to mention in the shortest time possible to my ability.. heh..

Imagine this.. The numbness on your legs, the overwhelming fatigue, the cold evening air, not to mention the showers of blessings, the darkness.. just u, your pal and not forgetting your kind foreign guide and yes, stuck in the rainforest.. The experience definitely beats Amazing Race.. ]

- (Teachers' Day Celebration STOMP performance)

Having to stay back in school till 8.30 pm at least 3 times a week and having to come back on weekends.. trust me..its no joke man.. but when the day finally came and having to look back now.. its all worth the banging and hitting..

Its definitely an accomplishment having to hit chemcial tins (mind you.. there are 3/4 of my size) and dented rubbish bins in a very stylo-milo rhythm .. (we became such pros to the point that we were able to come up with new tunes within 5 minutes.. hehe.. compared to 5 hours when we first started out.. )

Funny thing is, initially everyone thought we were nut cases.. having to create a din in the school hall, disturbing badminton players' concentration (and trust me, this includes our dear P and VP. Well.. thanx to their undying faith in somewhat unorthodox (we're supposed to be creative and not forgettingthat we created the tunes without any professional help.. okok.. a little start-up help from a dear fren.. hehe) performance.. we successfully swept them off their feet with our rhythm.. :-)

well.. im still trying to figure out how to include the clip of the performance here.. but as usual..im html and software illiterate.. haiz.. i might forget about it.. heh..

- Finally... i got back the discipline of attending religious classes .. despite the fact that it was hard having to tell yourself to get out of the office by 7 pm :-) (even though you have a whole pile of work to be done.. Trust me... its pretty therapeutic just having to sit down and listen to divine words.. hehe.. (its better than having me to scream the top of my lungs in class everytime)

- Cutting down on my monthly expenses.. (Hey.. i deserve an whole round of applause for this you know.. ) Its like having that devil in you, enticing and mesmerising you (like i was like super big voodoo doll) to just spend your money away ... shoes.. facials.. clothes..and more shoes.. oh..not forgetting my facial masks.. food.. food.. its even more deadly if you have 'The Potent Plastic Card' ..yes.. don't oretend like you don't know what I mean.. The 'NETS' or 'Debit MasterCard'.. a substitute to your EXTREMELY DEADLY --> The Credit Card.. haiz.. So much for being more money-savvy..

(Well.. admit it we're not that perfect..and due to that fact.. I just can't resist the urge of spending the moment i stepped into Kinokuniya or Borders.. yikes..!! Its only 1 book.. okok.. 2 books.. :-))

Well...looking back.. its been quite a 'journey'.. short (like me) but totally exceptional & unique.. (like me..heh..) and you bet not even your Credit Card can replace all that blast :-)

"Live Simply...?" (Part II) - Happy Belated Mum's Day..

Happy Mothers' Day..

"To all mothers and mums-to-be .... U deserve the best for bringing us into this world... Thank you .. Love U Loads... ;-)"

Mothers' Day celebration didnt turn out that bad.. it all started by me sending out mothers' day sms to all my dear frenz, which goes somewhat like this:-

" Katak Pisang, Katak Puru..
Adakah katak dan pisang sepupu?
Jangan perasan..
Jangan terharu..
Bukan nak ucapkan I rindu U..
Cuma nak ucapkan
'Selamat Hari Ibu' kat Mak U ;-)"

Heh... I know its crap..but what the heck.. we love our mothers dun we???

Well.. so me and my dear zany bunch of cousins congregate (or malay call it 'serbu') at my dear aunt's place to celebrate mothers' day.. but before that as usual... life wudnt be interesting if u dun pick a fight with people once in a while..heh..

Story goes somewhat like this....

[We were at Swensens to buy mothers' day cake.. and fine.. after choosing the specially-made mothers' day cake from the fridge display.. and after paying for it.. guess what..?

"Im sory md'm.. the cake that u bought is actually out of stock.. "

What duh??? ok ..so what now?? ive paid for it.. u better go get me something or my mum is gona scream at u before i do..!!!! Y the heck did u suggest me a cake that is out of stock.. where r all the cakes wen u need them the most..!!! (looking at the time.. yikes.. we're late..arghh..)

So dat poor fella went to find me a cake... heh.. ahh.. gd choice... "oreo cookies ice cream cake.."im glad at least tht fella has good sense of taste.. heh.. well..ok we'll take that..ok..time to rush to my mothers' day celebration...

"Selamat Hari Ibu...Selamat Hari Ibu... Selamat Hari Ibu....lalalalaa...." - we got a choir specially imported from China, India and Malaysia to sing the songs above.. hehe... (well the blessings of having inter-cultural / international marriages in a family...heheh..I juz love my family... )]


OK..so much crap about proving that life isnt that simple after all.... but ironincally, where does all that satistfaction and the sense of being grateful for just being in this world comes from? ahh...ahh....

And yes... my dil still goes singing "mmm...mmm..mmm.." even though life isnt a bed of roses..

That's the beauty of life.. all you need to do is to appreciate what you have.. simple or not.. who cares... as long as you're grateful for the very existence of yourself in this world.. and yes people.. we do have our missions.. nah.. im not gona preach..but yah..u get what i mean... (err..no...we're not here to place nuclear bombs as and where we want to destroy ppl's lives.. no.. we advocate PEACE.. ok.. )

Take your time to stop and reflect... like what my dad used to say.. "dun think too much.. follow the very first thing that comes to your mind/heart...coz that's the most sincere thought that you have.. the moment u start to ponder and sit on it for ages.. thats where complications will set in my dear gurl... dun be afraid.. just go for it.. "

(ahh.. dun we just love our fathers... awwww...)

So do we have a conclusion to our situation?

Live simply?

Hmm... everyone trying to define life..
As how its being depicted in movies..well.. we have the following examples which relate life to food or anything that is tangible basically...

"Life is like a box of chocolate...

Life is like an ice-cream..eat it before it melts...

Life is like a stage where we are the actors and the actresses... directed by Him..

Life is like rojak... the mix and match of it.. messy but taste fantastic.."

(ok, i came up wid that last one..heh...)

Admit it..there are certain points in your life where you try to summarise the meaning of life into something that is comprehensible.. though it might not be a very good representation... but what the heck... be happy that at least you have tried to decipher the meaning of life.. its a continuous process (long and may be ardous to some..) but hang in there.. we're all in it.. learn to accept it ..its all a matter of perspective.. :-)

And yes.. we can live simply despite all that complications.. again its a matter of perspective and choice.. :-)

Hey..look at it this way.. if our Prophet Muhammad S.A.W can do it.. insyaAllah... I bet we can..

Yeah.. ;-)

Saaalammm Namaste...

"Live Simply...?"

"Live Simply.."

Sounds simple huh.. ? I beg to differ my fren.. Let's start by analysing from the microscopic level point of view..

"The Eukaryotic Cell.. "

I hope i get the biological term rite..

Just within 1 tiny weeny little living cell, you have a 1001 of biological processes.. What's more if you go on and study the whole entire body system..just to get that heart (which is the size of your fist) beating, fit and healthy.. more than a million processes are taking place simultaneously..

Yeah.. not that simple after all.. even tho' we wish it was THAT simple..

Does simplicity leads to perfection or idealism ?
How does one define simplicity?
Simplicity equates to being 'Normal'? (huh? does that mean that im abnormal??)

Hmm....Let me have a go at this.. and see if it leads us to enlightenment or more confusions...

Hypothesis: There are many compliations behind that simplicity.

Test:

My Definition of Simplicity...

1) Taking the Average / Moderation

To moderate all the inputs and outputs of life.

(Keyword: MODERATION)

*Moderation in spending... (heh.. come on.. this is easier said than done.. )

Expenditure includes the following..

- Cali. fitness monthly fees
- Shopping of my SRK dvds
- Shoes... (ah.. we cant resist this can we gurls???)
- Taxis... (ok..i admit im down with this 'Hands-Up-For-Taxi' syndrome...)
- Karaoke.. (How can I live without it ???? At least once every two weeks... deniably addicted to it..)
- Clothes.. heh.. self-explanatory...
- Facials and Self-Pampering treats.. (Its called the "Oonly Me Treat"..I deserve that good body scrub, body mask and massage after my ordeal in school..)
- Hair Treatments.. (OK.. i cant deny myself from that damn good scalp and hair treatment.. its my dignity man.. balding is a no-no.. NO!!!!!)
- Food.. ahhaaha.... (ok.. Eat to Live)


* Moderation in Eating

- Ok.. we can cut down on that.. (err.. do i have to give up my cheesecake?? oh TiDAKK!!!! NO ..No.. Nahi..nahi... )

[Sidetrack: Finally i get that Oreo Cheesecake recipe from Kak Mus.. ahaha.. ok.. we'll try it out soon.. I'll definitely update you on it.. even if its burnt.. well.. at least im starting to bake something.. ]

* Rainbow of Life

Alrite..we know we cant expect perfections in life.. im not perfect .. u're not perfect.. but when two/ more imperfect invididuals come together.. you'll be surprised how perfect we can be.. (",)

5 'C's : Compromise, Communication, Compassion, Companionship & Camaraderie.. :-)

And yes.. Expect the Unexpected...

Welcome Surprises.. It makes your life more colourful...

"Dun push yourself too hard my dear.. Most importantly, you did your best.. Nah, nah.. its not the results.. but the journey/ process to that results that matters most.. Gotta take it in your stride.." --> Ok.. i noe..easier said than done.. heh..

* Old Prophecy (Part One) --> " Study hard.. get a gd job.. your future will be bright.."

Hmm... ok.. we noe in the modern world its crap --> Read "Poor Dad, Rich Dad".. You'll realise it.. and no.. im not promoting network marketing for any company... standards of living (especially living in a metropolitan urban concrete jungle) have increased ten-folds compared to our gran nannies and daddies time.. and no.. u can never find a decent meal at a cost of 50 cents anymore.. (unless ure starting out at a primary school...)

* Old Prophecy (Part Two) --> " Good job.. find a partner.. have a nice family..."

Ha-ha-ha.. ok.. who come up with that phrase..???? !! My goodness... ok.. your 'que sera sera.. watever will be, will be.." no.. that doesnt apply anymore.. smell the air of reality.. yes.. there's always the silver lining behind every cloud.. Pessimism lurking in every sentence...

ok.. breathe in and out... Hold on Tightly to your

3 F's :- Family, Friends & Faith in Him...

Yep! :-)

(To be continued...)

Salaaaam Namaste !!!

Saaalaaaaam Namaste !!!!

Extremely Intoxicating.. Pure Indulgence.. Mmmm.... :-)

Roots of Insanity: -

* 8 hours full swing of work.. plus
* 3 hours dose of watching fantastic Hindi movie with your bestest pal.. plus
* 4 hours of belting your lungs out at Partyworld with your gd peeps.. plus
* 1 curry puff + 1 eclair + 1 hot mug of honey ... minus
* heart-wrenching memories of kingkong... divided by
* 2 complete world of beliefs

Equals to :-

* Complete insanity

* Singing to Myself (The 'Mic' is Da' Most Lethal Weapon of the Century man...) whilst lab practical been conducted (" Ahem.. Cher.. dis one not Partyworld .. heh)

* Tormenting students with my blasting of 100 Shah Rukh Khan Hindi songs while class test been conducted (muahahahaha...)--> tests have shown that its good to have both right and left brains workout..

* Panda eye bags

* 1001% crappiness

* Seeing images of my Shah Rukh waving at me... heck what ppl say.. i still love him (MAJOR RED ALERT: my brain needs some tuning, man..)

* Partial Absentminded - ness (yes... the gadget called 'Handphone' was left at home.. its a blessing in disguise.. hahaha..)

* Partial 'cork-eye' ness while reading msn messages (sori ain.. i forget to put that plastic round thing in my left eye.. wats the name of that plastic??? errr.. nvm)

* Hmm..strange.. kingkong gone BUT "My Dil (heart) goes Mmmmm.... :-)" strange.. nice feeling tho'.. maybe its an indication of brand new me.. (my dil still goes mmmm..)

* And yeah.. I dress down to work..really dress down.. (u noe u really dress down when ur colleagues start asking "eh.. y u so casual today?? wassup with the sandals??" heh..

* Penalty for my kids for not doing my chemistry tutorial:
"You owe me a box of chocolate, my dear... better be halal & good.. heh.."


Conclusion:

I love myself, my life, my peeps, my physically looking adult but toddler-minded kids in school.. & i love SHAH RUKH KHAN!!!!!!!!! hahahah... (Ok.. im Gone..hhahha..)

SING IT PEOPLE!!!!

"MY DIL GOES Mmmmmmmm.... my dil goes mmmmmm..... " hehe..

Btw.. ppl who needs to hear to good hindi songs... here's the link .. its free music.. but yah..u cant download.. but u can choose frm the wide range of songs.. its categorised according to movie.. heh..

http://www.musicindiaonline.com/l/17/i/

AND.. u can get my Salaam Namaste down here.. heh.. ENJOY...

http://www.musicindiaonline.com/l/17/s/movie_name.8031/